Big Time Heartbroken
by UnpredictablyRandomOne
Summary: Katie gets her heart broken. James is there to remind her, she's never alone. Rated T cause I'm paranoid One-Shot!


Here is my peace offering for taking so long to update Big Time Birthday Surprise. I hope it's good enough to gain some reviews and forgiveness. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush and am not making any money from this.

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For the last year, Katie had been hanging out with Jake every chance she got. He was funny, had a great smile, he liked the same things she did and he always made her feel better. Whenever she stepped into the classroom, Jake would go up to her and wrap his arms tightly around her, making her feel loved. He would smile at her from across the classroom, making funny faces to get her to smile as well. He would go up to her during lunch and listen to her complain about her day or whatever she wanted to talk about.

Jake would walk her to class, wait for her after the last class was over and he'd still walk her home. Katie's friends would tease her, telling her how obvious it was that he liked her. She didn't think that was true until he'd asked her to dinner and a movie. That was pretty much a typical first date, right? Kendall hadn't been happy about his baby sister going on a date but he'd let her go anyway, with a little encouragement from their mom, of course. Katie had been so happy that day. She had bought a new pair of jeans and a cute blouse, knowing she looked good for her first date. During the movie, he'd held her hand, shared popcorn, nachos and even a soda. She'd had so much fun.

Dinner had been even better. He'd bought her everything she wanted and talked about whatever came to mind. There was never an awkward silence, everything was going great. When they were leaving the restaurant, they'd bumped into some of his friends and he'd introduced her as his 'best friend, for now' before winking at her. Katie hadn't been able to stop the blush that appeared across her cheeks, she felt incredibly special. When he'd dropped her off at home, he'd hugged her but before he'd leaned in for a kiss, Kendall had opened the door and sent him on his way.

After their date, even though Jake hadn't called it that, they'd become even closer. She had met his mom and brothers, which all treated her as if they'd known her for years. Katie really liked his family, she felt completely accepted. At school, they'd had class events where there was usually dancing and he'd always dance with her, showing her off to the class. She had no idea how a princess felt but Katie was pretty sure this was better. Kendall would always ask her if Jake had officially asked her to be his girlfriend, yet but almost a year later he still hadn't. When Kendall told her to move on, that nothing would come of it but a broken heart, she didn't believe him. Jake probably just wanted to wait for the right moment.

Of course, her brother had been right. The next day at school, was the first day during that year that Jake hadn't engulfed her in a tight hug. Katie had walked into class to see him talking to a group of girls Katie didn't really talk to. Jake noticed when Katie walked in and had only given her a short wave and small smile. That was it. Not wanting to cause a scene, Katie had returned the greeting, trying to hide the hurt she was feeling. During the rest of the class, Jake didn't look her way, not once. He'd been too busy talking with one of the other girls. Katie wasn't a jealous person, she really wasn't. But she did feel rejected, tossed aside and completely abandoned.

During lunch, her friends had immediately told her he wasn't worth it, that he was a jerk. They obviously knew something she didn't but wouldn't tell her straight out. She hadn't even told them what had happened in her first class but they knew. After school, she had walked out of her class and it had taken all her strength not to cry when she realized Jake wasn't waiting for her, he'd left her without even a goodbye. Her walk home had been filled with questions; had she done something wrong, had she scared him away? Was there something wrong with how she looked? Was she not good enough for him, for anybody?

Once she'd arrived at home, she'd forced herself to act like nothing was wrong, she had to pretend her heart wasn't slowly breaking into a million pieces. Stepping inside, she noticed that Kendall was playing some video game with his friends: Logan, Carlos and James. They hadn't seemed to notice her walk in and she was grateful, the last thing she wanted was for them to know she was in such terrible pain. Even though she wanted Jake to get his ass kicked by her four big brothers, she didn't want him to know how hurt she was. Katie didn't want anyone to know she felt like some kind of failure.

A few hours after keeping herself locked in her room, refusing to shed a single tear, she knew she had to get out and eat something. She had skipped breakfast and lunch, well, she couldn't remember having touched her food so now, her stomach was demanding fuel. Taking a deep breath, she forced a smile on her face and walked into the kitchen where her mom was making fish sticks. Great, fish stick Friday. Her mom noticed right away that something was bothering her baby but decided it was something to discuss when the boys were out of earshot.

Katie was laughing with her boys, trying to ignore the painful way her heart was aching. Maybe she was overreacting and Jake hadn't meant to hurt her, maybe he was trying to make new friends and somehow, he'd forgotten about her. Okay, it was a bit of a stretch but it was possible, right? Katie looked up when someone knocked on their door. Carlos, ever the energetic one, jumped up from his seat and ran to open it. Katie couldn't help but smile when Carlos said it was Jake wanting to talk to her, she quickly made her way outside and closed the door, knowing Jake was here to apologize.

"Hey, Jake. What's up?" She knew she had been right, there was no way Jake would ever hurt her on purpose. He smiled at her, that same smile that she'd fallen in love with.

"You know how I didn't walk you home today?" Katie nodded, obviously she knew that, she'd walked home alone and feeling terrible. "Well, I forgot to ask you for my notebook and I kind of need it back."

That was it? He came to get his notebook, not to apologize? Didn't he know she was hurting? Katie decided enough was enough, she had to know what was going on with them, if there was a them at all.

"Jake, why didn't you hang out with me today?"

"I didn't? Oh, my bad." He laughed as if she'd said something funny. "I guess I completely forgot. You know how I've had a crush on Julie? Well, I found out she likes me back and I thought I'd give it a try."

Out of all the excuses Katie had prepared herself to hear, a love confession for someone else had never crossed her mind. He liked Julie, not Katie. After almost a year of loving Jake, he'd dropped her as if she was nothing. She felt angry, hurt, crushed, confused, she felt like she'd failed at something. How had she screwed up the best thing to happen to her?

"But I thought, weren't we, I mean, don't you like me?" Her mind was completely scrambled, she couldn't form any coherent sentences. Had she misinterpreted everything? No, her friends had seen the same thing, they all thought they were an actual couple. Jake, for his part, looked embarrassed.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Katie. I wasn't trying to lead you on, I thought you knew I liked someone else. I just hanged out with you because you're a pretty cool kid, fun to hang around with, you know? That's it."

Katie felt as if someone had played the worst prank on her heart. All this time, he had made her feel special, like she was a princess who deserved the best all the time and now, he was leaving her in the dirt. She didn't want him to see her cry so she forced a laugh, which sounded weak even to her own ears.

"Right, of course." Katie cleared her throat, feeling it closing more each time she spoke. "I guess we can work on getting you with Julie, then."

Jake smiled, he actually smiled as if nothing was wrong. Katie wanted to cry, she wanted her mom to hug her and let her know everything was going to be okay.

"Don't worry about it, I already asked her out and she said yes." That was the last straw. Katie could literally feel her heart shattering. She had fallen for Jake completely and he'd only used her to have someone to hang out with. How could she move on from this?

"Jake, you're a turd. Don't ever speak to me again." Katie opened the door and closed it behind her. Knowing it was only a matter of seconds before she started to cry. Leaning against the door, she watched the guys give her a worry glance and that was all it took. The tears started running down her face, sobbing loudly as well, she felt so embarrassed she ran to her room and shut the door before locking it. Jumping into her bed, she hugged her pillow tightly, hoping it would somehow make the pain go away.

"Katie, sweetie, can I come in?"

Even though she wanted her mom to make everything better, she knew that wouldn't happen. Nothing and nobody would make this terrible pain go away.

"Go away! I don't want to see anybody!" She cried. All she wanted was to be left alone, she didn't want anybody to see her so weak. She loved Jake, she really loved him and thought he'd felt the same way. What was wrong with her, why couldn't he love her back?

"It's just me, honey. The guys ran after Jake to find out what happened. Please, let me in."

Katie shook her head as she continued to cry, not bothering to answer her mom. Jake didn't want her. He'd made her feel special just to show her what she wasn't. He'd made it seemed like he loved her only to show her she wasn't. How could she have thought someone as great as Jake could ever love her? She wasn't anything compared to Julie. Katie felt like everything she did from now on, would never be good enough. She was a failure, a nobody who didn't deserve to be loved.

Crying herself to sleep, Katie dreamt of Jake telling her she wasn't worth anything in front of the school. Everyone was laughing at her, calling her a nobody. She could even see Kendall, James, Logan and Carlos in the audience, shouting _failure_ at her. Her own mom was telling people she had disowned Katie and was ashamed to have carried her for nine months. Everyone had turned their backs on her because they'd realized she wasn't anything worth loving.

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Katie woke up crying, feeling her eyes sore and swollen. She could barely make out the time through her puffy eyes but after a few seconds, she read out the numbers. Five thirty in the morning. She couldn't believe she'd practically slept through the night. Her mind was fuzzy but she could remember everything that had happened. Jake had not only broken her heart, he'd broken who Katie was. Her confidence was gone, she could only feel doubt about who she was. She felt weak and worthless. Still sobbing, she stood up and quietly made her way to the kitchen, needing some water for her parched throat.

Once she had filled her glass, she took a long drink, feeling the cool liquid run down her throat. She turned when she heard a door open and close. Thinking it was her mom, she was surprised to see James coming her way. Looking at the floor, she made her way to the couch and sat down, not sure she could ever face him or anyone else for that matter. Katie felt James sit down next to her but she still refused to look at him. She was too embarrassed.

"You're not worthless." He whispered. Katie flinched, how had he known she was feeling like that? "I know that's what you're thinking because I've been where you are. I had my heart broken two years ago, just like you and that's how I felt."

"You have no idea what happened to me and you don't have to lie to try and make me feel better, James." She cringed at how awful her voice sounded, all that crying must have messed up more than her eyes.

"After you ran into your room, the guys and I went after that-that sorry excuse for a boy and he told us what happened. Katie, I know you're hurting and I know you feel like there's something wrong with you." Katie couldn't help it, she looked over at him and knew he was being honest, he really did know how she was feeling.

"So you know how I feel, that doesn't mean you understand." The hurt was terrible, she would never wish it on anybody.

"I do understand. Two years, I started hanging out with this girl, Mary Ellen. We did everything together, when I wasn't hanging out with the guys that is." He chuckled. "We played hockey, we went to the movies, out to eat, hung out at the parks, I fell for her hard." He sighed as he ran a hand through his messy hair, which Katie couldn't help but notice, made him look very handsome. She remembered Mary Ellen but had never wondered why she'd stopped hanging out with them. One day she had just disappeared and Katie had been okay with it.

"The day I finally got the courage to ask her to be my girlfriend, she told me she liked someone else. She had used me to get close to him." Even after two years, Katie could hear the hurt behind his calm voice. She held his hand, letting him know she was there for him. She may not be the best to offer comfort but she hoped he knew she was still there for him.

"I'm sorry." Katie whispered. She knew how he must have felt and wished he wouldn't have gone through that.

"After that, I questioned everything about myself. Was I not good looking enough? Was I not smart enough? I started thinking everything was wrong with me and maybe I wasn't worth anybody's time. I stopped going out, stopped trying to impress people, I didn't want to look at anybody, thinking they'd see my worthlessness."

"Then, about a week later, I found out the guy she liked was none other than Kendall." Katie felt her jaw drop, quickly closing it when James only chuckled at her. "Instead of feeling mad at him, though, I felt like I wasn't good enough to be his friend. He was obviously better than me, I didn't deserve to be around him."

"Thankfully, Kendall turned her away and told her to never talk to us again. Told her to forget me, that she wasn't worthy enough to hang out with me, let alone date me. He straight out told her that if she thought she was better than me, she wasn't good enough for our group. He made me see that I was worth so much more than whatever Mary Ellen thought of me and I knew with my best friends always by my side, I'd never forget that and I'd never be alone." James wrapped an arm around Katie's shoulders, knowing how much she'd need her friends, her brothers.

"You're not alone, we got your back and we're not leaving you."

Katie broke down. She cried into his shirt, knowing he wouldn't mind as James held her tightly. The feeling of not being wanted hurt, she'd given her heart to Jake, she had thrown herself out there and nobody had caught her. She knew what James was saying was true but her heart refused to accept it. Jake hadn't loved her for a reason, she just didn't know what that reason was.

"It hurts so bad, James. I just want it to stop." She managed to say between sobs. James clenched his fists, wishing he'd beaten Jake to a pulp. Too bad Kendall had been the only one allowed to do so, seeing as he was her biological brother and Logan had said only one would get the privilege. More than one would kill him, according to the doctor in training. The way Kendall had left him made him feel a little better, though. Jake would look like a punching bag for weeks.

"I know, I know it hurts right now but with time the pain will lessen. Trust me, I know for a fact that it will slowly fade away, you just have to hold on until then." He whispered, kissing the top of her head. "I wish there was an instant cure but a broken heart can only heal with time."

"He didn't want me..." She whispered after a few minutes of crying. James closed his eyes, hating how Katie was feeling. If he ever ran into Jake again, he'd make him suffer.

"That's because he couldn't see your worth, if he had, he wouldn't have let you go. One day, you'll meet someone who'll see how special you are. He'll see how beautiful you are, how smart and incredible you are and he'll hold onto you forever. Never wanting to let go."

"I'll settle for the one that likes me." James barely made out what she said and figured she hadn't meant to say that outloud. He lifted her head, making her look into his eyes. Seeing her so devestated was breaking his heart.

"Katie Knight, you are not the type of girl that will settle for anything less than what she deserves. You know what you want and you'll fight until you get it. You're worth so much, you just can't see it right now. If I have to remind you each day that you're worth a lot more than you think, I'll do it. I'll remind you until you finally see for yourself and don't need me anymore."

Katie hugged him, knowing he was being serious. If he said he'd remind her every day, he would. That's just who James was, an incredible friend.

"He's going to tell everyone what happened, nobody will look at me after that."

"Oh, I don't think he's going to tell anyone what happened. Logan made it perfectly clear that if anyone found out about this, he'd personally make sure Jake would catch some mysterious disease that would mess us his face, permanently."

Katie smiled, her first real smile since the whole incident with Jake. She thanked James, leaning her head against him and soon after, fell asleep, knowing her boys would keep her safe. James smiled, knowing Katie was going to be okay, he'd make sure of it. Moving a strand of hair away from her face, he couldn't help but admire her. She was beautiful. Jake was just too stupid to see it.

"You never told us you felt worthless."

It took all of James strength not to jump from his seat at the sudden voice behind him. After a few deep breaths, he turned to glare at Kendall who was giving him a small apologetic smile. Apparently, he'd been standing nearby for some time if he'd heard James confession.

"Maybe cause I didn't want you to know."

"You should have told us, we would have shown you just how important you were to us."

"You did show me. Every day you put up with me and never left me, you showed me how wanted I was. Thanks."

James knew he was incredibly lucky to have friends like the ones he had, they were irreplaceable. And just like they'd been there for him, they would all be there for Katie.

"No problem." Kendall muttered, taking a seat on the other side of his baby sister. "Now, to help Katie see how important she is."

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Ay, it killed me to write this because it's so damn close to something I went through. I hope you guys liked it and please, please let me know what you think about it. I appreciate any and all feedback. Thank you!


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